doctopus:

what if you spoke in your icon’s voice for an entire week

afternoonsnoozebutton:

This story that’s been going around has been pissing me off so much. Like wow, maybe if you actually put a tenth of the effort that was put into this spreadsheet into figuring out what turns your wife on and off (hint: passive aggressive spreadsheet-making is probably a turn off), you wouldn’t be getting turned down so damn often.

afternoonsnoozebutton:

This story that’s been going around has been pissing me off so much. Like wow, maybe if you actually put a tenth of the effort that was put into this spreadsheet into figuring out what turns your wife on and off (hint: passive aggressive spreadsheet-making is probably a turn off), you wouldn’t be getting turned down so damn often.

teachytv:

10 years ago today, Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way went back in time to sedouce Volxemort and protect all of us from his evil plans

reblog this post to honor Enoby’s brave sacrifice, ignore if you’re a prep or a poser

 

I went tubing in Helen today and o list my sunglasses and I could cry it’s so sad

Why are roasting marshmallows so hard to get right. Who thoughts this was fun

person: but what if your parents had aborted YOU
me: well okay for starters i wouldn't have been forced to hear that stupid ass comment you just made
 

kuzuryuusan:

i hate when you’re outside and the sun

 

not-a-comedian:

12exe:

Horton hears somebody he used to know

image

do you ever regret drawing something

 
officialblueshell:

Happy valentines day babe!! Yah I got u a bottle of fucking ketchup

officialblueshell:

Happy valentines day babe!! Yah I got u a bottle of fucking ketchup

hughhfancy:

doubledipperpines:

hughhfancy:

doubledipperpines:

I really love how my grandparents have helped pay for my 16 and 17 year old cousins’ cars and have yet to offer any help to me

If you’re driving a minivan though does that make you

Dan the man in the paedo van

Because I called you that THREE YEARS AGO IT IS NOW RELEVANT

ITS A MINIVAN so it looks like I HAVE children rather than stalk children
Think mom with 5 children

You’re a mum with 5 children wow you’ve been gettin bizzay

I am so offended by you

courtnog:

okay so if harry potter was born in 1980, and went to hogwarts in like 91, that means he was in his sixth year in 1996
do you think he knew about the spice girls? i mean.. i know he had shit going on with horcruxes that year but wannabe isn’t something that happens without you taking note of it

 

Can anyone give me one good reason as to why I shouldn’t call out sick to work tomorrow so I can go to a cabin with my cousin???

hughhfancy:

doubledipperpines:

I really love how my grandparents have helped pay for my 16 and 17 year old cousins’ cars and have yet to offer any help to me

If you’re driving a minivan though does that make you

Dan the man in the paedo van

Because I called you that THREE YEARS AGO IT IS NOW RELEVANT

ITS A MINIVAN so it looks like I HAVE children rather than stalk children
Think mom with 5 children

I really love how my grandparents have helped pay for my 16 and 17 year old cousins’ cars and have yet to offer any help to me